Monday, June 8, 2009.

Someone teach me. How to love my younger sister.

THIS IS SO MADDENING.

my grandma just scolded me nicely and i took it seriously about how i am not treating my younger sister nicely.
and yes, i know i am mean towards her, and yes, it is about her again, but she says that's not the point.

she says that i am not giving her enough attention towards her.

like take yesterday for example. she was playing by herself the entire day while everyone was busy on their own things.
yes i am guilty.
but how on earth do i give attention to her?
when i never fail to fight with her over the simplest thing?

How on earth can i play with her, and actually understand what she is trying to say, when i cannot stand her character?

how am i suppose to show love towards her?
how am i suppose to show that i do not hate her and want her to die so badly?

and she kept rolling her eyes when i was scolding her on table manners.
for whoever's sake! she rolled her eyes like, more than 20 times?!
I felt so badly to just... Oh, I don't know, gouge her eyes out?

like when my grandma was lecturing me nicely on it, she was giggling and laughing away.
isn't it rude?
I felt so badly to just... Oh, I don't know, punch her?

and also, I am VIOLENT.
a very violent person, cause i was brought up, the what? oh yes the hard way.
hard way= not talking, hitting slapping caning and blah blah.

so maybe i should go for, control your fist management, it might help.
or even better, go for both control your fist and anger managment!

who knows?

ugh, this is so frustrating.
anyone with little younger brother/sisters and really close with them, with BIG age difference like 9 years or more.
can you please kindly teach me how to play or actually talk without fighting with her?

drop a little tag on my cbox. PLEASE.

oh dear god, i feel so.... pissed.
ughhhhhhhhhhhh.

this sucks big time. ==

p.s
good god, now what?

{ 8:07 PM }

narcissism.

her name is amanda laura age 15 going to 16, she is a tarot card reader , blessed with family and friends. :)

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